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Isabela turns 1 tomorrow!

our family went from this:

to this:

( sorry, dont have an early pic with buster in it)
And, I have been an emotional wreck all week. I keep thinking, "this time last year, I was....."going into labor! here I am 5-6 cm dilated!

I can't believe that a full year has passed. And what a year! filled with so many ups and downs, heartaches, challenges, but mostly joy.

Isabela suffered from numerous food and chemical allergies. I lived on a vegan, gluten free diet for about 7 months, so that she could continue to breastfeed. It was a huge lifestyle change, very hard at times, but so totally worth it. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Isabela also suffered from severe acid reflux. She had to be put on medicine when she was only about 5 weeks old. This broke my heart, but nothing else worked! We tried 3 different medicines, tons of natural remedies, and so much more....
Only a mommy who has been through this can totally understand how frustrating and exhausting it is....

I felt so helpless, so broken, and so alone during the peak times of her acid reflux and food allergy problems. For about 3 months ( after her 1st month of doing nothing but sleeping) Isabela cried every waking moment. We might have had about 3 hours a week when she was not crying. She would only sleep for 15 min at a time - even at night.
I would sleep holding her upright in my arms, which was the only thing that kept her acid reflux down. I carried her in a sling alot during the day, bc she was only happy if she was upright.

I was so exhausted. It was during these times why I fully understood why God wanted me to leave my career. I totally understood that I was right where I needed to be. Sure, I was tired. I felt completely broken at times.
My child was in pain. severe pain, and we didn't know what it was at first. Doctors even thought that she might need surgery at one point.here I am with her appt with the GER specialist

I remember that day, bc it was her lowest point. She had been projectile vomiting for about 6 hours ( 6 feedings). Then, her vomit started to become curdled and was tinged yellow. Thats when I knew she was throwing up stomach bile and called Chris crying.

Isn't it horrible when your child is sick and you have no idea what to do, how to help...? I knew she was sick, and I knew she was in pain. A mother always knows.

I changed my diet. Went on an 'elimination diet' to try and identify food allergy culprits. No one told me to do it. Like I said, a mother always knows. I cut out milk, wheat, eggs, meat, peanuts...etc.

It took about a month.

During that 4th month one of the medicine started working. We could still hear her acid reflux sometimes.....but not all the time. And in combination with a vegan, gluten free diet, Isabela began to get better.


During the 5th month, she was dramatically better. My diet change, plus her Prevacid made a dramatic change in her personality. All of a sudden, she was able to breastfeed without writhing in pain from the reflux. She was able to lay flat on her back for short periods of time. We still co-slept, but I no longer had to hold her upright any longer. I was so thankful and prayed that she would grow out of the reflux and food allergies, like most babies do.

During the 7th month, I brought Isabela up to the alter to be prayed for. I had been praying for her myself , of course, but I just felt that God was calling us up there.

That week, I began to give Isabela her medicine only every other day. 3 weeks later, she was completely off her medicine, with no signs of acid reflux. During the 8th month, I introduced wheat back into my diet. Gradually, I introduced dairy, meat, soy and peanuts back into it, also. By the end of the 8th month, Isabela was showing no reactions, at all, to anything!

Woooohoooooooo!!!! Before, if I ate any of the above allergens, Isabela would throw up, have diarrhea, break out in hives, and would began wheezing. Then, all of a sudden, and within 30-60 days, my daughter is acid reflux free and allergy free!!!

Her doctor was shocked....speechless, as they are used to seeing more gradual changes. She had also predicted that Isabela would most likely grow out of the wheat and dairy allergy, but would continue to be allergic to peanuts and soy ( I think I remember that right).

Who else can shock and awe like God can, folks! I give all the glory to him, because there is no other explanation. Miracles can and do happen, and as I sit here reminiscing, I think of what a powerful story of praise I have here.


I wish I would have shared this earlier. I bring you these memories of what we went through as a reminder of the God we serve.

Just a few days ago, on my personal blog, i wrote about my struggle with being a sahm. How, I struggled with being a mommy and ultimately, it goes down to me not really feeling like I'm a good enough mommy and wife.


And now, I catch myself thinking back to the 1st 4 months of Isa's life. Which were very hard and filled with doctors checkups.

I want to say that we were incredibly lucky that all Isabela struggled with was reflux and allergies. There are a few people I know who going through so much more with their families, and my heart is full of prayers for them.

Still, no matter what our situation, we need to remember that God uses these times to shape our character, to mold us, and to get us ready for the days ahead. I might not have felt that God was there for me at the time, but he was more than ever.


Because when I look back at me, then, I know this. I was and AM a damn good mother. I stayed up with her all night, rocking her and comforting her through her pain. I held her all day, during the times she was in crying. I knew I couldn't take her pain away, so all I could do was my very best to give her comfort and security in the depths of my love. I changed my diet for her. I found the patience (from GOD) to continue breastfeeding her, even though she would often scream throughout our sessions. I coslept with her to give her the security she needed at the time...even if I never could fall asleep myself. Some would say I'm crazy. I agree.

Because for 4 months straight, all I knew was that my daughter was in some kind of pain. She would look into my eyes as if she was pleading for help. Her cries were not normal...and all I could think of is, "my daughter is in pain." What do I do?
And my heart would say, hold her. Make her feel secure in your love. Let her know that even though she hurts, you will always love her.

And I did.

And, I found a love so strong, so endless, that it gave me energy when I thought I had none left. It gave me more patience then I ever thought I could have and a peace amidst the storm.


Most of all, it has helped me to realize how God loves me. Just like Isabela, who as a baby, was in pain and helpless, so are we, at times. And just like I did, God holds us. He carries us, sings to us, whispers his love to us. He wants us to know that we can rejoice and be secure in his love and character.

And thats why being a mother is so important. It is our job to imitate God's love over and over and over again. ( the same goes for marriage too!)


And thats what I take with me from this past year. That I can rejoice and be secure in His love and character. That when I'm helpless and broken in pain, my Father is right there, holding me and loving me.

I am so thankful for Isabela, our blessing from God. I am so thankful for the love of God who has sustained me. I am so thankful for the promise of another year with my family. I am incredibly thankful for the love and support of my bestest friend and husband, Chris. Without his support and encouragement, I wouldn't be the woman I am today.



In love!